7 High-Maintenance Houseplants to Avoid
There are a few prima donna plants that I’ve vowed never to buy again because they’re a massive pain in the behind. Save yourself some bother and take note—I’ve suffered so you don’t have to.
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Philodendron Birkin
For the longest time, the Philodendron Birkin was my favorite plant. The pinstripe leaves are simply mesmerizing, but this plant can be quite the diva. Despite its striking appearance, many people find it challenging, and I’ve started to understand why.
This plant’s new white leaves often get tied up or turn brown and mushy before falling off. After three years of trying to crack the code, it remains as mysterious as the Bermuda Triangle. I’ve tried everything from moving it to a terracotta pot to adjusting its light exposure, but nothing seems to work. When I repotted it, the roots looked fine, so I’m left puzzled. Splitting it into multiple offspring and putting them on a rehab program might be my last resort.
More details about Philodendron Birkin: Click here
Tradescantia Tricolor
This one leaves me feeling gutted because I absolutely love it when it’s healthy. The pink and cream variegation is almost good enough to eat (but don’t!). However, maintaining its beauty is a constant battle. The stems get longer, die off at the base, and the plant ends up looking messy. Restarting it frequently helps, but it gets tedious. If your tricolor is turning green, it’s not getting enough light. Move it to a brighter spot to give the variegated leaves a fighting chance.
Chinese Money Plant (Pilea Peperomioides)
The Chinese Money Plant, or Pilea Peperomioides, is notorious for dropping leaves at the bottom, leading to an unattractive appearance. I propagated these plants extensively, but over the years, I’ve given most of them away. Now, I’m left with just the grumpy mother plant. She takes up too much space and is always in need of more light, making her difficult to place.
Alocasia Amazonica (Elephant Ear)
The Alocasia Amazonica, or Elephant Ear, is the Quasimodo of the plant world. Despite its unique charm, this plant has a frustrating tendency to lose all its leaves as winter approaches. To avoid this, a good grow light is essential. My plant was down to a single leaf last winter, but all the growth you see now is new from this year.
Orchids
Orchids are lovely and have a cult following on YouTube, but I find them awkward. They require a lot of light, but their leaves are so oddly shaped that they don’t fit on any windowsill. Despite their beauty, finding a suitable spot for them in my home has been a challenge. They thrive with plenty of light and no soil, but making their roots happy is crucial.
Chlorophytum Orchidastrum (The Orchidastrum)
This plant, with its black leaves, has been a battle for over a year. Medium light and water conditioner seem to be the keys to success. Bright light and chlorine buildup from tap water are their enemies. Stick to these guidelines, and you might just keep this plant happy.
Hoyas
Hoyas are another favorite, but they can be quite rampant, taking over everything in their path. They grow rapidly with a bit of light and occasional watering. I’m concerned they might choke out my Devil’s Ivy, but time will tell.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How can I keep my Tradescantia Tricolor from turning into a mess?
A: Tradescantia Tricolor is gorgeous but a bit high-maintenance. When it starts getting leggy and messy, it’s time to restart. Snip off the healthy bits and propagate them. And if the colors are fading to green, it means it needs more light—move it to a brighter spot and let those variegated leaves shine!
For details: Learn more about the propagation of Tradescantia Tricolor
Q: My Chinese Money Plant keeps dropping leaves. What am I doing wrong?
A: Welcome to the club! Chinese Money Plants tend to drop leaves, especially from the bottom. This can be due to inconsistent watering or low light. Keep her in bright, indirect light and water when the top inch of soil feels dry. And don’t be afraid to propagate—those babies can make great gifts!
For details: Understand the common issues with Chinese Money Plants.
Q: My Alocasia Amazonica (Elephant Ear) is losing all its leaves. Help!
A: Don’t panic! Elephant Ears often go into dormancy when the days get shorter. A grow light can work wonders to keep them from shedding all their leaves. If it does lose leaves, just be patient—it’ll bounce back with new growth when the conditions are right.
For details: Read about the dormancy patterns of Alocasia plants.
Q: How do I keep my orchids happy? They seem so finicky.
A: Orchids can be a bit awkward, but they’re not too tough once you get the hang of it. They love bright, indirect light and hate having soggy roots. Use a pot with good drainage and let those roots breathe. And yes, they’re a bit like Goldilocks with their placement, so you might need to try a few spots before they’re happy.
For details: Check out my orchid care tips and tricks.
Q: My Chlorophytum Orchidastrum has black leaves. What’s wrong?
A: Black leaves can be a sign of too much light or chlorine buildup from tap water. Keep this plant in medium light and use water that’s been conditioned to remove chlorine. It’s a bit finicky, but with these tweaks, it should start looking healthier.
Q: Why are my Hoyas taking over everything?
A: Hoyas are like the indoor plant world’s version of Japanese knotweed! They grow like crazy with just a bit of light and water. If they’re starting to smother other plants, give them their own space to shine. Regular pruning can help keep them in check and looking fabulous.